I Knew I Had It In Me. . .

“I knew I had it in me

But I still had to do it.”

I’m not a thrill seeker, nor do I know anything more about snowboarding than that falling down will kill your score. But Shaun White’s words after his gold medal run in the half pipe at the PyeongChang Olympics reminds me again how important physical goals are for my writing goals.

At this time of year, people are either doggedly moving forward towards what they want or they have let their resolutions fall away. Fitness, in fact, is never my resolution. But it is the foundation of my resolutions.

When I’m tired. . .

When feel weak. . .

When success is not a personal best but working out at all. . .

When I don’t believe I’ve gotten any stronger in months. . .

When I still feel fat. . .

When I need a reminder to keep pushing. . .

When I’m bored. . .

When I feel like quitting. . .

When I’m corrected. . .

When someone else lifts a heavier weight that I think should be my personal best. . .

When my form is poor. . .

When I’d just rather watch television. . .

When I need a reminder to go back to basics. . .

When the trainer doesn’t notice me. . .

When no matter how hard I work, the answer is cutting something out. . .

When I don’t like a particular exercise. . .

When we focus too many days on a particular muscle. . .

When the trainer does notice me. . .

When I’m challenged by other people in class. . .

When I realize I don’t know what my goal is. . .

When I don’t live up to what I believe I can do. . .

In fact, I wrote a review for my gym recently. It read something like this.

I have personal and professional goals in my life that will take years to achieve. I need a daily reminder of how hard I can work, what the sting of failure feels like when I was sure I wouldn’t, and what the thrill of achievement feels like when I was sure I couldn’t. Perhaps distinct from other members, I do not go to the gym because it helps me achieve particular fitness goals. I use the challenge of a carefully researched fitness program personalized to my strengths and weaknesses so that I maintain the determination and patience to work towards everything else I want in my life.

I know I have it in me,

But I still have to do it.

Everyday.

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